Pat | Motueka, Tasman

“Old ladies have to have a long time to think about these things. A heart-to-heart story that led to something. Probably doing time for Trindi on the committee there. We had heart-to-heart stories, didn’t we, Trindi? 

Because I’ve had six children, I guess I’ve had lots of heart-to-heart stories with my five daughters, = giving them all sorts of advice, which they probably haven’t followed. 

During the lockdown and the virus my telephone was red-hot, and I guess that’s when we needed heart-to-heart stories to support each other, and we did. I find, at my age, because I can’t travel or drive, that the telephone is a great idea. I don’t have a computer, so I talk on the telephone a lot of times, particularly to my church friends, and we do have heart-to-heart talks about different things, about our families mainly. 

Our minister, Reverend Janet was always very helpful, and I talked to her a lot, and I like to think that my talking might have helped her. It wasn’t her so much helping me. I was supporting Janet and I think ministers need support.

I have a son who is a vicar, so I’ve got first-hand experience of ministers in the church, and everybody looks to them for advice. They’re the strong people and they’ve got God, but He’s rather a long way away, and sometimes they need people to talk to, and people that they can trust that whatever they say is not going to go any further. I like to think I’m one of those. 

I think heart-to-heart talks are important, because it’s not good storing things you’re worried about inside. If you share with somebody, although it’s not a good idea to say, well I’ve been there and done that, but you usually have when you get to 90 years old. So, I think because I’m a very old lady, people talk to me more. I don’t know why it is. I think it’s a matter of age, they feel they can trust older people more, for some strange reason. I like to think I give them that support.

I’m blessed with a positive attitude. You’re either a positive or a negative person. Work at being positive. I’m very lucky to have been born a positive person, with a good family. I came from England to New Zealand in 1951, so in the last, 70-odd years, I consider myself a New Zealander, and very blessed to consider myself a New Zealander, and having had a New Zealand husband and family, I have had a very blessed life. It might sound a bit strange to some people, but my main thing has always been my background in the church. I’ve always felt very supported by my church friends.”

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